A letter to my circumcised son: I am sorry

Dear little Kason,

You will be three in two days!! I cannot believe how time flies. I am ssure you will get whatever you want on your brithday!!! I am thrilled to see how much of a little man you are becoming. I wanted to write this to you because i feel like i took away something that should have never went away.. I regret it and i hope one day you will forgive me. I remember the day you where born... how perfect you where! I know you where early but i was amazed on how wonderful you where and how warm and cuddly you where. I was told by your doctor that you had something wrong with your little boy parts that would later have to be fixed.. Little did i know that you where in for ... At 6 months i sent you in to fix the problem with your boy parts.. what they did to you was not my plan.. The cut you and then left you open.. you would cry everytime you went pee and when you slept you would whimper from the pain.. I understand that i could have stopped that!! I could have saved you from the pain... But i was not fast enough.. now three years later i sit and look at you when i change your diaper and see that things are not right.. they didnt do it right.. you will have to have surgery... I AM SOOO SORRY!!! ...  I want you to know you are perfect to me !! I love you little man!!!

You saved your little brother you know... you are my hero!!! I now know it is never ok to take someones pride away.. like i took yours.. but now i know.. know i know and i am sorry

I love you

Mommy

Why i am the parent i am!!

Why I chose to be the parent I am

I remember my parents giving me the curse “you will get back three times the problems that you caused us!”  Nine years later I have to disagree. I started by having my daughter at 18. I listened to everyone’s advice but my own. I let doctors convince me I was not good enough to make choices medically for my child and I let family tell me how to fill in the other pieces. I did the cry-it-out method… I did the bottle feeding… I did the path that most said was easy. I hated hearing my daughter scream in bed and the proceed to vomit. I hated listen to her cry when I would put her down and walk away. I was basically saying “ I have cared for you enough, you handle your life on your own.” I am sickened by the memory.  Two years after she was born I had my son. By then I had the idea that I would stand up for my rights and raise my child the way I wanted. At his birth I did not let him go far (even though I fought to have him on my chest). I breastfed him even though they tried to shove bottles into his mouth and I co slept against hospital policy. He was mine I didn’t want anything but the best for him! He ended up being sick most of his infancy, but our bond kept him strong. I had my youngest son when my oldest was 2 years old. This time i knew the risks of circumcision, this time I was ready to turn down the loads of vaccinations.. I continued to co-sleep, baby-wear and breastfeed… my youngest is 10 months now and I am sure that all of my children know that they are well loved.

Why did I choose to be the parent I am?  Why do I co-sleep, breastfeed, delay vaccinations, no circ, baby wear and lastly why do I attachment parent?

I see there is so much we are not teaching and doing with our children.. I lived at a children’s home at one point in my life and saw the product of a motherless and fatherless childhood. I saw how most of the children were like little zombies. Most of them had no emotion and would fight constantly. I swore to myself then that if I ever had children, they would know I loved them! When my second child was born I did the exact opposite of the world and saw that there is so much to be learned! That’s why I am what I am and I believe what I believe ! I think that mutilating a baby boys penis is horrible!!!  It is it rips him of his right to have a normal and more pleasurable sex life. Moms you are cutting away nerves and precious flesh!!! Don’t fight with me about religion and other reasons because I know where I stand.  I co-sleep next to my sweet little ones.. I have a family Bed!!!  I know most would shove in my face that my kids are spoiled and I will never get a night to myself and that I am risking rolling over on my infant son.. I have done this before and I know that there is a safe way to co-sleep and a not so safe way to co sleep and I take every precaution. I see how happy my children are when they wake up.. They will smile and play and wake me and my husband up!!  There is nights when we move them into the front so we can have some time to ourselves and when we have our time we move them all back in!! I baby-wear! I love it !! I love holding my son close to me! I love to be able to smell his sweet baby skin and I am sure he loves the warmth and cuddles.. He screams at the end of the day when I take him out. He loves to be close to mommy!!  I do not allow my children to have multiple vaccines; I have delayed my children’s vaccinations! I do not believe a child should be stabbed by 7 needles and injected with loads of toxins in one sitting!!  I breastfeed!!!! I love the closeness of it all. I love knowing that my infant son will be healthy and have a lower risk of diabetes and being overweight. Lastly I am a AP ( attachment parent) . I love the fact that my children will know my love and not my voice.. I am glad my kids will learn my love with hugs instead of my distaste with spankings. I want them to know that the world may be dark and mean , but as a mom I can bring them love and comfort!! 

Why did I choose this…. Why would I go against the norm?

Because the norm is not working and our world is slowly slipping … here is to a better world for our babies..!!!

Written by Mary Kaitlyn Richardson

BLOG: Calling Motherhood ©

my war with processed food .. oh my aching tummy

Well this will be the last time i let my fiancé go to the store!!! I let him go thinking, maybe just maybe he knows what i want the kids to eat and he knows what i like. He returned home with junk food!!! I was crushed! What store did you go to? Does this man not know what the canned chili does to me? He bought the ground beef in a tube!!! AHHHHHHHH!!!!! I calmed down and started putting up the items that would on a regular basis, make me sit all day on the potty!! Normally my basket is filled with whole wheat bread and organic grain fed chicken... not some poor animal hacked  to death!! I smiled at him making him feel like he did great, knowing if i was mean i would upset him. See part of changing a house over from processed to clean is the opposite party that does not care any other way doesn’t even keep up!! Two days later I am back in the bathroom crying because all the fats and oil is making my IBS worse. I have been rid of the pesky runs and gas for awhile only for it to come back!!! I know I rant on and on about eating raw foods and veggies and how good it is for you.. I wish people would see how wonderful this stuff tastes.. I am truly addicted.!! well enough of that.. i am going back to my salad and window gazing!!

Your one of those natural birth, babywearing, breastfeeding moms ? Yes , Yes i am !!

Lately i have been to so many play dates, pools and shopping centers , i cant even keep up ! I love to go out and spread the word by action that nursing in public and the baby wearing thing is all normal!! I was shopping at walmart and decided heck, lets see what people say to baby wearing!! I was stopped several times asking me why not put him in a baby seat that Walmart provides? I told the few nay sayers "  I choose to keep my baby close to me and he likes it, so i am going with what he wants." Some people came over and cooed and played with my sons one free arm! I was amazed that some even gave me kind words of support!

I love being asked questions about how i feel about natural birth and the wonders of breastfeeding. I was in a article here in town about nursing in public during the Target nurse in.. how else can i speak about this new found love? I love how i have bonded with my three children! I admit we are still working on the organic eating and the clean eating aspect as daddy doesn't help when he brings home junk food!! Let me make one thing straight.. I will not be a mainstream, trendy mother. I prefer to live my life in a simple cotton tee shirt and a pair of maternity/blue jeans! I do have a few things in my house many crunchy moms do not have. But i love the ideas and ways these mothers live .. I plan to take it a step farther soon.. Maybe learning to live off the land instead of buying foods? making my kids clothes? Who knows but i cant seem to think of anything else to write about but this!!

anyways till next time!!

So i am sitting here at my house as usual with nothing to do but write, watch TV and  that's about it. I have spent hours on facebook today looking at peoples babies, their wedding photos, their lives on a daily basis and countless ads about different products.  I guess my screen time was used for the next 5 days because man i am cross eyed. I started this entry without a topic and then thought, wow maybe all the distraction  makes it harder for me to get things done ( like write here)

I have thought about how fast time goes and the little things that i should have enjoyed with one child, i didn't enjoy with the other. I know that my delay in writing was because i have never had time to think , much less write .. I was pausing for awhile to enjoy the small things!! It is weird almost to look back and think i went through some of the most extraordinary things the last few years and i haven't wrote about them.. I think that i am on the writers block road!!! Mind you what doesn't help a lot of the time is the fact my 9 month old screams when i am not around.  Will Calling Motherhood become a helpless rant about how being a mother is ?

I know a lot of people that actually know me know how i live my life. Most of it revolves around the kids. I wake up feed them and clothe them for the day and allow them to run around my house, build tents and pretend they are rulers of fairy land!! No really i do! My daughter loves to pretend!! I love it that my child has imaginary friends and that my son pretends that he is on a race track on his cars ride on toy!! I love that my kids are normal!!  I have done nothing but devote my time a research into making sure i am doing best for them and then shrugging off the things that do not matter!  I think life is what you make it. Don't make it any harder for yourselves !

enough ranting for one day!!! until next time

I am stormy momma

You remember when you where a kid and you heard the thunder rumble outside your windows .. Where you afraid of it or did you love it?I was always the first one on the porch pointing at the night sky as lightning flashed and thunder rumbled.. I remember my grandmother telling me that it was the Angels bowling and the rain was them crying because someone was hurt etc.. Now that I am Older I see weather in a new way. I love the feeling of the rain and love the soft rumbles of thunder.. I am a storm spotter and I am so ready to take it farther.. So I started a new segment of my blog called stormy momma moments... Maybe it will help people learn about weather.. Maybe it will be the bragging point for me to show my respect for God's power.. I'll fill you in as soon as possible as well as do my other posts!!

Until it storms!!!

I am mom enough!!

Hi I am Katie a mother of three or otherwise known as short order chef, nurse, personal advisor, maid, taxi driver , event scheduler ... Need I go on

I have started a journey the last few years that I won't ever forget!! I also had the chance to show my support for breastfeeding mothers with the target nurse in.. I feel mom enough... I feel like my children have a bond with me that will never go away.

Now that I am part of the greatest debate ever.. I see that I have a lot of work to do! From nursing in public to supporting those around me! I see that this will take awhile.. Why ? Because close minded people live in this country and refuse to change..

Now will the media please come forward... Will they ask me the truth behind my feelings on this.. I plan to do my own version of the mom enough picture.. Maybe show support to all those moms who don't feel it!! It's a hard job.. It make for long hours and all nighters ..

I am mom enough!!!