Monday, February 21, 2011

(Re-Cap) No mom is perfect: peer pressure

Have you ever heard the words… “you should do this instead of that, you are spoiling your children” , ” Oh my you can’t let them sleep with you , that could kill them!” and the all famous ” if you don’t wean you can’t do anything!”
My son is now at the cute age of 10 months and well, when people used to shout ” you need to breastfeed!” and “you can’t spoil a baby!” they are now shouting the opposite. What am i a programmed Robot that takes orders from other on how my children are to be raised! How can you tell a person to stop eating from their favorite spot and expect them to like it, or tell someone to go sleep in a dark enclosed area with no lights and no sound when they listen to their favorite music for more than 9 months and had a dim light to allow them to see?
That is what we miss as adults where we do this to our precious little babies and our toddlers when we decided to wean them early because of our own agenda or use the cry it out method to make them sleep in their own bed so we can have our own place!
I have went through the cry it out method, it was horrible…. i listened to my precious baby scream her head off and then start to vomit uncontrollably all over her bed and the floor! But still my parents who i lived with at the time as well as family told me that she needed to get out of my bed and into her crib or else she will never leave it! I was a teen mother and a first time mother, that’s why i fell for it! Two years later i gave birth to my son and swore up and down i would never ever do that to my second child, that i would train him slowly by naps and get him sleepy enough to get used to it and at night he could sleep with his mommy. So far i have saved him keep breathing and alive by keeping him from throwing up all his food as a newborn, with a preemie it is hard not to want to hold them as much as you can, they thrive off of love and being held. I have saved him from carving open his face with his fingers because of his skin condition, and i have saved him from choking on his own snot from a cold, the same thing that changed my mine when my daughter at only 9 months turned blue on me one night from… she had RSV
Weaning for a breastfeeding mom is almost as traumatic as it is for the baby! We love that one on one comfort we get from our little nursling cuddling into are arms. I remember how hard it was when i was a bottle feeder, i stayed up with a screaming baby, who at no cost could be comforted until 6 weeks later found a formula that worked!!! But then the illnesses and another things set in and i wish i could have saved her from some of this mess! When i found out i was pregnant, yet again i told myself i would do better! When he was born i did the skin on skin and started to nurse this little baby who weighed 6 lbs and was only skin and bones, now you could never tell. My favorite thing about this is he has only been sick 3 times, my daughter had been sick over 25 by this age! I remember when we got the H1N1 and i was sick with it, through the fever and the sickness i fed my son, who yes caught it and did pretty well! The doctor at children’s told me that i was saving him by breastfeeding him. ( at that time he was 1 1/2 months old and 10 pounds)
Now begins my rant here is a few things people spouted out at me!!
Your still nursing your son, you wont be able to do anything!: Not true, i do everything i need in a day and get it done! Just a few breaks to sit down and nurse wont kill me! I do not want to drink and well i think the added benefits count more than the other!
you co-sleep with your kids, they are spoiled: nope i call them safe, more babies die from SIDS in a crib than any bed with their parents! ( i know that for a fact, my daughter could have been one)
you should not hold them and cuddle them at long they are spoiled: Yup spoiled with love, try holding your kids longer, we all take that for granted !!!
You make your own judgment and well if you don’t agree that is fine, but this is where i stand

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